Free

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery...
You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.
Galations 5:1,13

It hit me like a bolt of lightning today, if you'll pardon the cliche. I was out walking, listening to music, caught in the funk I've been in for quite awhile. You know the funk I'm talking about. Feeling sorry for myself. Convinced that I've been right and everyone else is wrong. Wondering why in the world nothing has seemed to work even though I have been doing everything I should be doing.

All the while I couldn't see the through thick veil of my own sin to realize that I was enslaved. Not only that, I'd let myself become a slave again to the master I was set free from! Suddenly the Spirit shone through the haze. It all came rushing to me, as if I was viewing the events of the past couple of months through a completely different view.

I realized how ugly I'd become inside.

Now I know why the Bible warns so strenuously against bitterness and resentment. It can grow so quickly and quietly you don't even recognize it until it has grown out of control. I'd been hurt and felt betrayed, and knew from the Bible that I was right and this other person was wrong.
But being right never gives anyone an excuse to be wrong.

It's self defeating to even think it. My hopelessness and bad attitude was ensuring that the wonderful things I had hoped God would do couldn't happen, at least not anywhere near me. It wasn't even the other person's fault anymore. It was mine.

Repentance brought a wave of relief and life that I haven't felt in awhile. Energized, I was able to pray and praise God the rest of the two mile walk. Now I have a hope, a true hope, not a fleeting hope based on my own arguments and efforts to change the situation I am involved in. The hope is that Jesus can do all the things that we can't, when we come to the realization that it's just not within our grasp.

He can make my attitude sweet when others hurt and betray, or misuse their position. He can cause me to react with love and think the best of my brothers and sisters. He can make right all the things going wrong in the body, but only if I get out of His way, and make my heart right before Him. If there is nothing within me but hopelessness and resentment, then I will only teach others around me to be hopeless and resentful. If I am full of His Spirit in a dry and thirsty land, others will see Jesus and be changed by Him.

So I'm allowing the Spirit to make me get out of the way. And to remember that I've been set free to serve others in love. Trying to do it any other way will only lead to the desert. I've been there. I'd rather be the tree planted by the water that brings forth fruit in any season.

Make me that tree, Lord. Give your precious resurrected Spirit to bridle my selfish worldly ways.

Remind me how you made me free.