Heaven Song

A Goodbye

Nellie Mae Doughty was born on July 25, 1925. I didn’t get to meet her until fifty-one years later, as Nellie Mae Hubble. But I got to hear about the adventures she had in the meantime. She grew up in Missouri with a bunch of brothers and sisters, which is why we always teased her about her “hillbilly” ways. She was pretty young when she fell in love with a soldier headed off to WWII. She told me that she didn’t know if he felt the same way until he kissed her goodbye instead of her cousin. He alone out of his group came back, and decided he would like to marry this beautiful girl.

Despite her obvious admiration, she didn’t make wooing an easy task for Grandpa. He had to ask quite a few times before she finally agreed to marry him. She planned her perfect church wedding, but a blood test result didn’t come back in time for Grandpa. So did they postpone the happy event? No, they crossed line into Arkansas where a blood test was not required and got married by a justice of the peace.

She had two daughters, though she always said she would have liked to have a big family. Little did she know at the time that God was planning on giving her nine grandchildren and 24 great-grandchildren before her time here was done.

It’s hard to know where to begin to speak about what my grandma meant to me. She wasn’t your typical grandma, but then she wasn’t your typical anything! Even if she weren’t the second most important woman in the world to me, it would have been hard not to love her.

I can categorize some of the wealth of memories within by using the five senses. Smells will forever be an instant reminder of my grandma. I remember sneaking into her room after she had finished putting on her makeup and doing her hair. The smell of aqua net hair spray, the fresh scent of her powder, and the light musky perfume that lingered in the air all serve as reminders of her to this day.

There are tastes that I’m sure she wasn’t planning on us remembering her by, but nevertheless we always will. Dr. Pepper, Kentucky Fried Chicken, her Thanksgiving dressing, ice cream sandwiches, just to name a few.

Seeing the pictures she took over the years, though she was always trying to stay out of them herself, reminds me of her. Always armed with her Polaroid camera, forever trying to capture moments and make them hers forever.

Hearing the stories she told while we sat at the kitchen table late into the night, sometimes a few of us, sometimes just the two of us. I got to hear all the stories that everyone else heard too, such as the cigar eating, the lost baby alligator, and the “Shower” incident, as well as a few that I never expected, and promised not to repeat. Grandma wasn’t one to hide her regrets or failures. She probably figured we could learn from them. And I for one, did.

I will always remember the touch of Grandma’s hands. They weren’t always gentle, such as when she would hold you down and tickle you or pinch you so hard she left a bruise. Her hands were rather frail for the last few years. But she had a way of communicating with her grip the love she felt for you, the will she had to hold you there forever so you wouldn’t go running back off into life, but stay with her instead. I always wished I could. It was hard to leave. Her touch may be the only thing some of her great-grandchildren will ever remember of her. Even in her last days, she was always on the floor crawling around with babies, carrying around toddlers that were too heavy for her, snuggling newborns even as she desperately tried to remember their names and which grandchild they belonged to.

Even as I try to draw this to a close, memories come rushing through my mind. How I could never win a game of Scrabble against her as hard as I tried, and how easy she made it look. How she’d bicker and carry on with Grandpa just to get a laugh out of us. I remember she’d lose Jenny and me in the store and hide in the clothes racks so we couldn’t find her. She had a funny way of acting like a ditz even though we both knew that she was smarter than I’d ever be.

Thank you, Grandma, for the legacy of faith. For the example of determination and spirit, and a life finished well. Thank you for being one of the best friends I’ve ever had. For loving me through the toughest times in life. For believing in me, delighting in me, and always telling me the truth.

I can’t wait to see you again. I love you more than these inadequate words can express.

Goodbye…. For now.

Fun Recipe Resource

Today's Pick of the Day - http://homeandfamily-miranda.blogspot.com/

The Solution to Winter Dry Hands

Day 3 of my top picks for home and family - the solution to dry skin issues. http://homeandfamily-miranda.blogspot.com/

New Post in Home and Family

Click on the link for my pick of the day!  http://homeandfamily-miranda.blogspot.com/

Taking Blogging to New Places

One of my goals for 2010 is to expand my blog. I've added an area dedicated to writing, which will mark my personal journey to authorhood as well as share authors, books and writing resources that have been helpful to me. You will find the link to this area at the top left.

Another area that has been added is Home and Family. This area will be reserved for ideas, resources and links to things that have become invaluable to me as homemaker, wife and mom. I've found I've gathered quite a bit of information in my ten years pursuing this goal, and it is time it was shared.

The main area will remain my focus for my wandering thoughts, mostly devotional in nature. As I learn more about the resources available to blogs, I will continue to improve this site and transform it into something that is useful to others and not just a personal journal. My goal as a writer is to meet the needs of others, not only to satisfy my personal need to muse in the form of words.

So I welcome feedback in the form of comments or emails. If you have any ideas for me, let me know!

Watch and Pray

2010. It's not just a new year. It's a new decade. Full of possibilities and inevitable change. There are some dire predictions for the next decade, and whether or not they will hold any credence remains to be seen.

Have you noticed how change makes us uneasy? I'm not sure why that is, but I suppose it is at least partly because change is a human trait, not divine. God doesn't change. But the comforting fact is that He allows change and decrees change in order to bring us closer to the image of Jesus.

As I went to bed last night, I asked God to tell me what business I should be about in this new coming year. I turned to my place in the gospel of Matthew, and commenced my reading about the experiences in the Garden of Gethsemane that fateful night. I realized how much I - and the church as a whole - resemble the sleeping disciples. Would they have been sleeping if they really had any idea what would unfold in the next few hours? Would we be so complacent and content if we had any idea what the next few years held in store?

The words of advice were clear. "Watch and pray, so you don't fall into temptation" -red letters seeming to emphasize the importance of the command.

There's no getting around it. I'm pretty content where I am. I'm not easily moved at the idea of changing my life, even for the glory of God. But what if there's more to why He has me here than grocery shopping and exercising on my eliptical, making lesson plans for homeschool and singing in the church choir? What if His glory requires that I let go of the lifestyle I'm so comfortable in? Even if it doesn't at this point in time, something tells me that "watching and praying" doesn't happen without being willing to do so.

So my goal for 2010 is to learn how to watch and pray. Bigger things are coming than we are capable of imagining. The closer we come to the culmination of this world's eventual demise, the more important it will be that we be paying attention. Watching. Praying. Willing to give up our desires for His plans for us. More mature in our thinking and focused on why we are here than how we can make ourselves more happy.

No more sleeping disciples while Jesus pleads for watchful prayer. The Holy Spirit will help us in our weakness if we will let Him.

Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. Then he said to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me."

Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will."

Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. "Could you men not keep watch with me for one hour?" he asked Peter. "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."

He went away a second time and prayed, "My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done."

When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. 44So he left them and went away once more and prayed the third time, saying the same thing.

Then he returned to the disciples and said to them, "Are you still sleeping and resting? Look, the hour is near, and the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Rise, let us go! Here comes my betrayer!"