Homesick for Heaven

Today, I'm a little more homesick for heaven.

Before he was there, the thought didn't cross my mind as much. I knew that heaven waited for me. I knew that Jesus was there, and that I'd see Him when my time here is through. But now, there is a tangible part of my being present in that mysterious other world, for this very moment my grandpa walks with Christ.

Some never know their grandparents. Those that do might not ever be close to them, know enough about who they are to really come to love them in any sort of depth.

I had the blessing of a grandpa who wanted to know me. Who wanted to be part of my life, who wanted to share all that he was with us, his nine grandchildren. What a wealth of memories are stored up within my mind! Grandpa was an element of so many wonderful adventures from my childhood. He always had a plan, something he wanted to teach us. He took us for truck rides through the woods, he played basketball with us, he tried to teach us how to play tennis and card games. He videotaped every major event and plenty of minor events in our lives. He said little with words, but so much with his heart, his passion for life, his convictions about his Lord. Though I don't remember a single time he said "I love you" there was not a shadow of a doubt in my mind that he did. He showed it through his time, his energy, his actions, his smile.

Now, he can't mow the lawn or ride his bike or take videos of great-grandchildren or watch a game on television. He can't tease my grandma or sit by her side at the doctor's office. But he can do plenty of things that he could never do before.

He can look on the face of Jesus. He can walk with him, talk with him, share joy with the Savior that I can only imagine. No longer do the weight of memories of war and loss and heartache burden his spirit. No longer does the horrors of cancer ravage his person. He is whole. He is happy. He has found perfect peace, perfect love, perfect life. All because one night many years ago he attended a revival meeting and discovered that there was a Savior Who could be the answer to all of the plagues and doubts that marked his life. Jesus could save him, could set him on a new path and give him ever increasing joy and peace first in this life, but ultimately in the next.

And on Valentine's Day last week, he finally laid down the shell of his worn and weary body and flew to heights yet unknown to me.

I'm sad. Because I know there's no way I'll ever lay eyes even once more on his precious face this side of glory. Because I know that Grandma is alone for the first time in 62 years. Because my mom and my aunt have lost a man that meant the world to them. Because all of my sisters and cousins have lost the greatest grandfather in the world.

But I'm so incredibly happy for him. It's a relief to know that his burdens have been laid down. And my heart has become homesick for a sweet land I am destined for. A beautiful place of joy where two very special people wait. Jesus and Grandpa.

Face to face with Christ, my Savior
Face to face—what will it be,
When with rapture I behold Him
Jesus Christ Who died for me?

Face to face I shall behold Him
Far beyond the starry sky;
Face to face in all His glory
I shall see Him by and by!

This blog entry is dedicated to the memory of my grandfather, John Herman Hubble, soldier, teacher... husband, father, grandfather, great-grandfather... April 11, 1921-February 14, 2008.