But for the Grace Go I

At the risk of adding to the problem, I have to say a few things about Jon and Kate Gosselin, the unlikely focus of the scrutiny of the world.

I've been bothered by the sick fascination of the media in what might be the demise of their home and marriage. Why, when there are plenty of hollywood stars who don't mind and even expect to have their pictures plastered across every tabloid in America, are two unfortunate parents taking their place?

Everyone is a judge. This blogger subscribes to a different attitude, and I believe it might serve us all to consider this perspective.

What would happen to me, if I were the parent of sextuplets and twins? If I hadn't asked for such a monumental task, hadn't done anything to cause such an unusual twist to my life, but found myself in the midst of the unthinkable with the person I had pledged my life to?

Only a handful of people can claim to know what it's like to be Jon and Kate. And what do we do? Berate them for their choices, slam them for their faults, and kick them when they are down, wagging our fingers at their shameful fall from grace. I can't take that position. Who are we to judge another's life, another's actions, another's sins or mistakes?

They took us into their homes. They allowed us to see them as they are, not hiding anything behind a mask of secrecy. We know Kate is rather uptight and controlling. She's never tried to deny that. She has admitted time and time again that it is something God is working on her to improve. And she HAS improved over the years. She's trying. We know that Jon doesn't like the spotlight. That he feels like he hasn't been able to make his own choices since stardom took over. And who among us would really like to be followed by cameras wherever they go? Isn't rebelling against that a likely response, whether right or wrong? And hasn't he apologized several times for his actions?

They have paid their debt to society and more. What happens now is between Jon Gosselin, Kate Gosselin, their Lord, and their children. It is not my business, it is not your business. We are not owed a peek into their privacy to see how they must resolve their relationship and the remnants of their dignity.

Put yourself in their position. Imagine the heartache of something that is crumbling around you that you thought would last for the rest of your life. Imagine trying to put that back together, piece by agonizing piece, while everyone around you watches and criticizes. Imagine it, and tell them that it is all their fault. We entered a trust with them when we allowed their family to be our entertainment. We have wronged them too. We've contributed, by eating up the frenzy of ridiculous media attention that they never gave permission for. By being entertained by their painful reality. By thinking that any one of us are above them because we could have done it better.

Jesus once told a mob ready to stone a woman who was caught in sin "He who is without sin may cast the first stone." I know that I'm not. There's no way I'm picking up a stone. I have fights with my husband, I have trouble remembering not to take control in our marriage, I don't always make the righteous choice. I'm sure those tendencies would be magnified a hundred fold if I were put in the situation they have been cast into. I only walk this road but for the grace of God. I only stay out of those waters by His grace.

So for Jon and Kate and their beautiful family, I will pray. Because I know that if they were standing here in this room with me, and I asked them what I could do, that's what they would ask for. They certainly wouldn't ask for my opinion, my curiosity, my judgment or my scrutiny.

Pray for them. Don't stop. And don't feed the media attention. Give this family some privacy.